Stefanie (00:00.294)
Age as an excuse is just that. It is an excuse. You can be young and still be successful. You can be old and still be successful. We have examples of people doing all kinds of things in these situations. However, it is a matter of what you are going to allow other people to speak over you, what you are going to allow to be your own reality, and how you are going to allow age to play out in your life, in the results that you are creating.
When you're looking at yourself and you're in this stage of life, when you have years that have gone before you, like I have two decades as a adult and my twenties and my thirties and now I'm hitting into my forties and that's hitting differently. And there were things that I could be doing now that I could say, okay, I've built this up the last 20 years. There's so much here. I could keep growing this, I keep doing this, but there's a big part of me that's like, I don't want to do that anymore.
That was who I was. doesn't have to be who defined who I am and who I'm going to be in the future. So I want to clarify that too. The other thing I want to put into this episode is the fact that when we are looking towards the future, where we are going, that you are not letting age and you're not letting somebody else's opinion filter into your life, into the results that you are going to create. If you have been feeling age as an excuse in any way, or form, this is the episode for you.
And if it hasn't come up yet, it's likely that it will. Especially we as women, we can feel age in different ways than men can. And I specifically recording this today. And I went outside for a walk this morning. I did not realize how cold the wind chill was. And it's like that wind just went right through me and I have gotten a chill and I'm trying to overcome this chill. But I had slated and scheduled in that I was going to record this video today. And I'm here and I'm doing it.
But if you're watching this video, you are literally seeing me layered up in different layers and attempting to get this chill out of my bones. And all that to say, having a chill in your bones is one of those things that older people tend to say. And I'm like, okay, I do feel the cold differently than I did in my youth. And I can even see between me and my children how we handle cold and heat differently. Okay, so I acknowledge that because I know that there's the physical realm.
Stefanie (02:24.0)
of our existence, our physical bodies do age and feel things differently at different ages. But don't let the age, the number of your years define how you're going to feel and what you're going to create. Because I could say, I've got this chill in my bones. And that means I'm going to get sick because I've heard a lot of older people say that. Like if they get a chill, they're like, the cold is coming. And they just start to welcome it in because they're expecting it.
The way that you are thinking is more important than anything else because the way that you think defines what you are going to create So you have got to be on guard about the thoughts that you're having that is why we're gonna have this conversation on age Because it's so important that you understand any elements that are in your life any excuses that you're saying any way that you are thinking that's shaping the results that you're getting because you have to find them based on age and making a limitation around the age
or what is possible at this age, friend, let's break free of all of that. When I was in my early 20s, I was told by my manager not to apply for a job, her job to be specific. She was being promoted and I had worked one-on-one with her. It was just me and her doing and managing the responsibilities of this department. This department that was although small, was a part of a very large company.
And yes, I acknowledge I didn't know everything that she knew and I knew that she had more background, industry experience and she was like 20 years my senior. So there was lived experience and life experience that she had. However, I let her opinion of whether or not I should even apply for that job completely impact what I did, my actions I took. And so I ended up never even applying for that job because of what she said to me.
And looking back, I'm like, I let her define my experience. I didn't even put myself into the pool. I didn't even believe in myself enough to do that. I was completely just wrecked by what she said, that she wouldn't believe in me to even attempt this position, that she didn't even see in me the ability to train me up and to develop me to take on this role, especially since we'd already worked so much hand in hand, that I was so like, it was like a
Stefanie (04:47.598)
popping a balloon and all the air going out of me, I was just like distraught. And then a couple of days later, one of her peers by age, by seniority, by all the things, but in a different department, but who knew of us and knew how we worked, said, Sevin, are you applying for this job? You'd make such a great fit for this role. And I said, no, why not? And I just like, without even thinking about it, I told her, well, so-and-so doesn't think that I'm ready for this job.
And she was, I can't really remember. cannot remember what she said to that, but I can remember how I articulated that and how deflated I was. Well, that alone shows I'm not ready. Okay. But it wasn't because of my age. was because of what I was thinking. And that's what I want to clarify for you, friend. It has always come back to what you were thinking. So in this case, what I had done is I had allowed her words to determine my future. Do you see that?
I had let what she said in her insight shape what I could and could not do. And it became more for me than just in this role. within the next year, I left this role and a large part of it came back to this decision right here because all of a sudden I felt like I wasn't valued in the way that I thought that I was, but it was about me. It was about the way that I was thinking that I had allowed this in. And I thought I am capable more. I know I can do more.
but because I'm young, can't do this. And I thought, is that true? But I allowed that to be truth about me. Friend, I want you to notice where you are allowing other people's judgments, other people's opinions to filter into your life and define you based on being too young or too old or not experienced enough or whatever the situation is. Is there room for you to develop? Is there room for you to challenge the status quo? Is there room for you to go after it no matter
These are the things that you got to look at because we are always going to have these different attacks. We're going to have different challenges. We're going to have the excuses. And if we're going to accept them, then that means we're not ready to move forward. Now to make this long story short, she went ahead. She ended up hiring somebody else who was kind of between her age and my age. I would say she was 20 years older than me.
Stefanie (07:06.976)
I was very early twenties. I was just out of college. So yes, there wasn't a matter of I not having some of the experience. I get that. But there was also some age factors here that it was about my youth. And I want to challenge that I was a very productive worker and I did really good at this particular role and what was involved in this role. I got it. I understood it. Now,
Once again, there are other factors that I can't completely understand and I'm looking at it just from my perspective, my perspective as a 20 year old versus her perspective in her 40s looking back. I might look at it very differently now that I'm in my 40s. Okay. But that's not the conversation we're having here. We're just looking at what are you allowing and what are you believing by yourself? The person she hired, I outworked them all the time and they were not a good fit for that role.
They were a delightful person. They were a wonderful person. They could do a lot with just conversation, but they talked so much and they were so involved in going to meetings, meeting meetings that they aren't actually getting the work done. And so much of the stuff that I needed approval for and that I was doing got piled up, piled up, piled up to the point that I gave my notice because it's like, I can't work like this. I can't remember how mad she was. And I was like, but I, like you and I are not working well together. And then from there I left the company and I went on to different things.
But I've noticed throughout my early years in my career, I was always thinking about how I could try and present myself as being older than I was instead of just acknowledging where I was age wise. I was trying to showcase myself and think bigger of myself. But now that I'm in my forties, I look back and I'm like, am I too old? Am I too young? Where does this factor matter? Don't let age define you. Age.
in and of itself is a very fluid number. It's just a number and it's very fluid how we receive it, how we perceive ourselves is the bigger thing, the thing that matters more and that comes back to your thoughts. What are you thinking about yourself? What are you thinking about what you're capable of? How you're going to show up? What you're going to give and do based on who you want to be? It doesn't matter about the age. Now sometimes you'll step into a room and you might be the youngest person there.
Stefanie (09:25.006)
Sometimes you might step in the room, you're maybe the oldest person there. How you are thinking is gonna impact how you show up and how you show up is how people are gonna receive you. So if you go in thinking, I am so much younger than everybody in here. Everybody's gonna be judging me for how young I am, which is a lot of the thoughts that I had in my 20s. We don't have to try and fit in, we just have to own who we are.
And no matter our age, if we own who we are, if we're confident in our ability to show up and be who we want to be, people will radiate with that. People will enjoy your presence no matter your age. And if they have an issue with it, that's on them. Don't let that judgment become a part of you. Don't take that on because we can decide for ourselves who we want to be, how we want to show up, all the different things, no matter our age, no matter other people's thoughts and judgments. That's on them.
not on you. It only becomes a part of your reality if you take it on. And so look at, are you allowing somebody else to speak over you, to assess what you are capable of? And are you leaning in to excuses about how old you are and the experience that you have, the abilities that you can create from this point on? All right, friend, that's what I've got for you today. Thank you so much for joining this simple conversation on age. It's an important one for us to have because it's a factor that plays into our lives.
And so I just want to encourage you and equip you to move forward. No matter age, there's so much that you can be doing. And as so long as we have life and health and breath and spirit activated here on earth, there's something that God can be doing in and through us, through you. And I encourage you to go out there and achieve it. For more resources and support, this is lifechangingmanifestations.com. Have yourself a fabulous day.
